Show up

So the choice of a woman is not to conjure beauty, but to let her defenses down. To choose to set aside her normal means of survivial and just let her heart show up. Beauty comes with it. Page 133, Captivating

I can't say my heart likes to show up. Lately, conjuring up beauty has been simpler than letting my defenses down. I guess that's why I get so mad when I only get compliments about my looks. There's nothing behind comments like that. So I dress well, so I can put on make up. I'm just like every other woman in Orange County. What I desire, what I crave, is for someone to look beyond that defensive wall, beyond the makeup and see what's hiding. Not many want to. Because, like the book says, and friends have acknowledged, a woman is a scary mystery. I'm surprised by the number of friends I have who have found men will to take the journey of discovery with them. Surprised, and encouraged. Mine's out there...somewhere...